A father walked past his son’s bedroom and noticed the room was unusually clean. On the pillow, he saw an envelope with his name on it. With a sense of worry, he opened it and began reading the letter with trembling hands.
Dear Dad,
I’m really sorry to have to tell you this, but I had to run away with my new girlfriend because I didn’t want to cause trouble with you and Mum. I’ve found true passion with Stacy. She’s so nice, but I knew you wouldn’t like her because of her piercings, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes, and because she’s much older than I am.
But it’s not just about the passion, Dad. Stacy’s pregnant. She says we will be happy together. She owns a trailer in the woods, and we have enough firewood to last all winter. We dream of having more children together.
Stacy has also shown me that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’re going to grow it ourselves and trade it with others in the commune for cocaine and ecstasy.
We’re hoping science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
Don’t worry, Dad. I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Maybe one day we’ll come back to visit, and you can meet all of your grandkids.
Love, your son Josh
P.S. Dad, none of this is true. I’m actually over at Jason’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report on the kitchen table. Call me when it’s safe for me to come home.
Follow us